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Ugly Duckling Crunchy Fudge Fruit Nut and Coconut Chocolate Biscuit Slice. Yeah, You Heard Me.

Fruit Nut Coconut Macaroon Biscuit Chocolate Slice

Just try telling me you don’t want a piece of that.

I could, alternatively, call this my Everything But The Kitchen Sink Slice. However, that would be a lie because I didn’t stir in the can of sardines I found next to the gluten-free vegan coconut cookies in my parents’ cupboard.

But you go right ahead, if that idea floats your boat. Personally, I don’t enjoy the taste of fish bones and chocolate together, but you might be more adventurous than I. (Mmm, chocolate cartilege…?)

Fruit Nut Coconut Macaroon Biscuit Chocolate Slice

This is the kind of old-fashioned, very sweet, bits-n-bobs-n-fun-to-make slice that would look perfectly at home at a school fête. Next to a plate of garishly-pink coconut ice and in front of a pile of toffees-in-patty-pan-cases-sprinkled-with-hundreds-and-thousands, this Ugly Duckling Slice would, I’m sure, be quickly snapped up by hordes of sugar-lovin’ children.

If it appeared in an Adriano Zumbo pastry case, though, I’m equally certain that this Ugly Duckling Slice wouldn’t stand a chance against Zumbo’s sophisticated creations. But you know what?

Sometimes you just want to make and eat a treat that reminds you of your childhood. And sometimes that’s enough to turn an Ugly Duckling into a Beautiful Swan.

Fruit Nut Coconut Macaroon Biscuit Chocolate Slice


Question Time: Are there are slices or cookies from your childhood that you sometimes wish you could revisit? (I’m not saying I’ll necessarily make them… but I might.)

54 comments | Leave your own

  1. L-Izzle

    This is the best looking ugly duckling ever. I want to roast it, slice it, and wrap it in rice paper with slices of cucumber and hoi sin sauce. And make Ugly Peking Duckling Rolls. I really feel that the fresh, cool crunch of the cucumber and salty stickiness of the sauce would provide a nice contrast to all the other sweet ingredients 😉

    As for childhood treats… I definitely remember slices like this from school fetes and friends’ birthday parties. Along with chocolate crackles and honeyjoys and butterfly cakes and lamingtons and gingerbread men and coconut ice and the like. But as far as stuff at home goes…my mum used to (and needs to more often, if you ask me!!!) make these amazing lemon bars/slices/something called ‘Lemon Love Notes’. They’re absolutely legendary in my family. They’re definitely not typical kiddie treats though… they’re suuuper lemony, in the most awesome way imaginable. They’re the ultimate childhood-memory baked good for me 🙂

  2. hungryandfrozen

    I have a feeling you missed the butter in the ingredients? I know, because I always. look. for. butter. Apart from that I’m practically moved to tears by how good this looks. It’s a very classic looking slice – there’s a million recipes like that in old New Zealand books and everyone’s Nanna’s slight variation on them all seem delicious. Ugly Ducklings FTW!

  3. Jess

    I definitely approve of the Everything But The Kitchen Sink approach. I took that approach with the muesli (well, “muesli”, since it was so bastardised) that I used to make to take to work for lunch. At one stage it was muesli that contained about 8 different ingredients itself, then depending how I felt it was mixed any combination of: 2 different types of yoghurt, 4 different types of nuts, Nutella, peanut butter, peanut butter powder, honey-roasted puffed rice, chopped dark chocolate, chopped white chocolate, chocolate ganache, bananas, 3 types of berry, extra oats, cocoa nibs, and crumbled biscuits. It was exciting to eat! What will the next mouthful bring? WHO KNOWS. Then I decided it was recklessly unhealthy and also I couldn’t be bothered any more.

    I have strangely few memories of childhood food, never mind specifically slices or cookies. I liked… chocolate chip cookies with milk chocolate and white chocolate chips. Apparently I didn’t have outlandish tastes as a child. I was probably too busy drawing birds or something. (I was so into birds. SO INTO THEM.)

  4. Fiona

    want to make me cake stall toffees?

  5. Conor @ HoldtheBeef

    This is a thing of beautiful inner beauty. Yes, beautiful beauty. It exists. The only way it could be more beautiful would be if I wasn’t mistaken in thinking that the first photo showed it had mushed up dried figs in it too. Please let there be mushed up figs in the next incarnation. For the sake of all things beautifully innerly beautiful!

    I don’t have the energy right now to make my own inner beauty bar but you’ve made me crave fairy bread and I think I have the energy to make some of that. Sweet.

  6. Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella

    But darling that is pure food porn! Looks at that oozy liquid chocolate. I think your Ugly Duckling grew up to be anything but!

  7. Jo

    Ah that looks good! I know my Mum baked, when I was young, but I don’t remember anything I particularly loved. I guess just regular chocolate cake. I was never a baked good kind of girl as I always preferred bars of chocolate but when I started calorie counting earlier this year I randomly started craving cake. Now I will always take cake over chocolate. It’s a wierd thing. I also never ate biscuits. For like 10 years I never had a biscuit. Now I like biscuits again . . .

  8. Iron Chef Shellie

    OMG =O Sooooo stealing this recipe!!

  9. penny aka jeroxie

    Ugly duckling? It is a disguise isn’t it? I want it all! SEnd some over?

  10. Lauren

    Ahh, a break from this 25,000 cell spreadsheet and sleep-deprived misery! I have to read every sentence three times to make any sense of it, but I can still understand pictures, and those look GOOD.

    Alas. Back to the grind. Hopefully I adjust to this 7.30 to 4.15 schedule soon.

  11. Camille

    It’s not baked? As in, that’s just bound with raw egg? Enlighten me.

  12. Jess

    There is nothing ugly about that slice!
    ps-I think Adriano Zumbo is a mega hottie are you in agreeance?

  13. Lisa (bakebikeblog)

    I could not agree more – this woudl be a perfect slice for a fete! I seem to recall having quite the love of caramel slice in my younger years 🙂

  14. Simply Life

    oh my gosh, that looks amazing!

  15. Alisa

    I cannot tell a lie – I want a HUGE slice of that crunchy, fudgy, coconutty, chocolate thing. My sweet tooth is killing me today and this is definitely not helping!

  16. Ashley@thehungryscholar

    You are like a food inventor. So much going on!

  17. Anna Johnston

    Wow…, you’ve got me with this one. Salivating this end, it looks so gooooooodd.

  18. whisperinggums

    You’ve eaten the Milk Arrowroots and Coconut Crunch biscuits too!? I don’t see no carrots in there though!

  19. Heidi - Apples Under My Bed

    Ugly has never looked so beautiful! Polished is so over-rated 🙂
    Heidi xo

  20. chanel11

    I am all for the Ugly Ducklings! Go Mighty Ducklings!

    I love your posts, they always crack me up 🙂

  21. Amber Shea @Almost Vegan

    You. Are. Amazing! Gah, I want to bathe in the frosting in that first pic…

  22. Emma @CakeMistress

    Aww, I think it looks totally tempting!! Love these kinds of slices which incorporate a bit of everything. And yours looks mega-delish.

  23. Johanna GGG

    this looks like a fancy pants hedgehog (just so long as it is beside toffee and coconut ice and not in a zumbo sweet display) so it gets a zillion nostalgia brownie points from me – I want a piece right now but I guess I need to work out what to have for an adult tea – sigh!

  24. April bishop

    Thank you for your great article. Also the pic is very nice.