As much as I’d love to eat only the finest of small-scale, artisan (or artisan-esque), astonishingly innovative, and lesser-known chocolates such as by Yarra Valley Chocolaterie, Ethiquable Chocolate, or Askinosie, to name a few, the truth is I haven’t yet won lotto (not buying tickets doesn’t help), and at times I’m powerless before the red sale tags that flash from the grocery store confectionery aisle.
Toblerone Crunchy Salted Almond
I have a soft spot for Toblerone — despite rarely eating the bars myself — because the mountain-shaped chocolate is one of two varieties of mainstream candy that I remember my dad being partial to as I was growing up (the other, of course, was Cherry Ripe).
I actually bought this new Toblerone Crunchy Salted Almond for my dad, but then ate it myself. What was I supposed to do? Australia was heatwave-ing thing at the same time as Canada was polar vortex-ing, and so I couldn’t trust that this would make it to him intact.
Described as “Swiss milk chocolate with salted caramelized almonds and honey and almond nougat”, there’s not a whole lot to say about this chocolate other than that it was pleasant, sweet, strong in typical Toblerone honey notes, and packed with chewy nougat and crispy-crunchy almond pieces, but lacked the promised salt kick that could have bumped it up a notch.
I wanted bursts of depth-giving salt, but got only milky, creamy (bordering on cloying) sweetness. There was nothing wrong it, per se, but it was too sweet for me.
So, Dad? You’re welcome. I took this one for the team.
Hershey’s Cookies ‘n’ Mint Milk Chocolate
Well then. Hershey’s. It’s come to this, hey? I’ve really and truly stooped this low. (Yes, I rank Hershey’s below Cadbury, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups aside.)
As little as I had to say about the Toblerone bar, methinks I have even less to spout about Hershey’s Cookies ‘n’ Mint Creamy Mint Milk Chocolate. It was… fine?
The aroma was, thankfully, more akin to After Eights than toothpaste, and the milk chocoalte was not as searingly sugar-forward as I feared. The mini cookie ball pieces has the pleasant crunch of Oreos, and lent a slightly darker cocoa taste to the overall mint-threaded flavour.
I’d rather eat this one again than the Toblerone bar, but that’s not saying much, because I’d also four billionty-percent rather eat Tater Tots than either of these.
No, for real. Tater Tots. Where are my Tater Tots? Have I ever even had Tater Tots? I don’t know. But I want them.