Riddle me this: is there any better way to celebrate the dawning of a new year than with chocolate and peanut butter?
No. The answer is no. Chocolate and peanut butter should always be used to mark the beginning of a new year, because chocolate and peanut butter together create such irrefutable and reliable deliciousness that to eat a treat based on their wondrousness is to ensure that your year is founded on happiness.
Look, yes. I know there are other aspects of life capable of helping 2013 start off with a bang. You could play frisbee in the park with friends, for example, or write a list of all the different ways you intend to be awesome in the next twelve months.
Personally, I wouldn’t mind if my 2013 began with the discovery that talking red pandas exist, because then I would track down such a talking red panda and convince him to be my best friend. I would call him Lord Snuggleruffle, he would call me Sparkleheart, and together we would live a life of such adventure that movies would be made about us and I’d end up with so much money from royalties that I could spend my life perpetually chasing summer, back and forth, back and forth, across the world.
I also wouldn’t mind starting 2013 by writing a post listing all the grammatical/spelling/just-plain-wrong errors I keep seeing in blogs. They’re driving me insane. Won’t somebody please employ me as The Internet’s Proofreader? Please? If I see one more person write “peaked my interest” instead of “piqued my interest”, “bare with me” instead of “bear with me”, or “here enlies the problem” instead of “herein lies the problem” (enlies isn’t even a word oh dear holy), I’m going to lie down in the snow until my eyelashes freeze together.
See? Starting the year with chocolate and peanut butter is far preferable to starting the year with a[n I-really-want-to-be-an-editor] rant about language errors.
Therefore I give you Puppy Chow. A strangely-named (here veganised) heavenly treat of Chex cereal coated in melted chocolate, peanut butter, and butter/vegan non-dairy spread, all tossed with icing sugar.
It’s incredible. It’s insanely sweet. It’s like crack. It’s American (of course). It’s chocolate and peanut butter and crispiness and sweetness. It’s irresistible. It’s Puppy Chow.
Oh, and the sculpture above? It’s made of neither chocolate nor peanut butter, but it is perhaps the most hilarious and terrifying piece of street art I’ve yet come across in Toronto, and thus it is great. (It is Koilos by Michael Christian.)
Happy New Year! Here’s to a 2013 filled with joy, sweetness, and the correct use of apostrophes.
Vegan Puppy Chow
Makes 9 cups. Recipe from all over the Internet.
- 1 cup vegan dark chocolate (I used a 70% dark chocolate)
- 1/2 cup creamy peanut butter
- 1/4 cup vegan non-dairy spread, such as Earth Balance or Nuttelex
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 9 cups Chex (rice cereal squares)
- 2 cups icing sugar
- Combine chocolate, peanut butter, and Earth Balance/non-dairy spread in a large saucepan over medium heat and stir until all melted together. Add in the vanilla, and stir to combine.
- Place the Chex cereal in a large bowl, then pour over the chocolate and peanut butter mixture. Gently stir until all the cereal squares are coated.
- Put the icing sugar in one enormous container/zip-lock bag or several smaller containers, and tip the coated cereal squares inside. Seal the containers/bags and shake shake shake! Shake shake shake! Shake your booty! … until the sugar has coated all the cereal.
- Place the cereal in the fridge until the chocolate hardens, and then enjoy. Preferably with your new talking red panda friend by your side. Because why not? Exactly. Happy New Year!