Hurrah! I’m in New York! My Great Big Gallivant has begun! As today’s title indicates, I’ve decided to tell you my flight story by way of:
33 Steps To Make Make Long-Distance Plane Travel Relatively Painless, with Bonus Chocolate
2. After dinner, arrive back home to start packing. Laugh hysterically when your father proclaims “the car will be leaving for the airport in eight hours”.
3. Finish packing after midnight. Go to bed. Lie awake.
4. Sleep for 1.5 hours. Get up at 4:20am.
5. AIRPORT. Buy compression socks, because Deb told you to.
6. Final hugs with parents. Start walking to plane. Have gallant man offer to carry your carry-on to the plane, because you clearly look feeble.
7. Fly from Canberra to Sydney. Get shuttle to international terminal. Have another gallant man offer to carry your carry-on, because you clearly look feeble. In customs line, run into your favourite Andy, who is flying to Israel. HEART SPARKLES. Of all the gin joints in all the world.
8. Talk with Andy for two hours.
9. Board plane to LA, thinking with dread of the boredom and frustration ahead because you’ve never been good at sleeping on planes.
10. Sleep for three hours as soon as the plane takes off.
11. Eat first meal on plane. Giggle because your vegan meal gets delivered first. Giggle again because someone drew a smiley face on your label. Giggle again because the cauliflower chana masala with raisin and almond couscous is surprisingly delicious.
12. Watch Monte Carlo. Disprove of blatant heteronormativity and stereotyping throughout entire movie, as well as bizarrely unresolved eating disorder subplot. Feel sorry for The Youth Of Today.
13. Eat chocolate.
14. Mini review of Domori Apurimac Peru 70% Dark Chocolate (thank you, Carolyn!):
- Aroma: butterscotch, caster sugar, meringue, plum
- Aesthetics: dark blue-black, crisp snap, well-tempered
- Melt: silky, smooth
- Taste: zesty but also earth, definite tangy lime meringue sweetness, smoky woodsy beneath, lemon curd and brownies, lovely
15. Doze a little.
16. Watch a thousand episodes of Modern Family.
17. Eat Qantas’ snack pack of grilled eggplant sandwich and apple berry muffin, both vegan.
18. Eat chocolate.
19. Mini review of Koko Black Dominican Republic 100% Dark Chocolate:
- Aroma: fear, terror, smoke, walnuts, brazil nuts, subtle, trees (what?)
- Aesthetics: black, glossy, pretty
- Melt: not as dry and chalky as other 100% dark chocolates that I’ve tried, firm and a little buttery
- Taste: not horrific (unlike, say, Dagoba’s version), actually edible, cooling, wood, twinge of red currants and sour plums at end.
2o. Eat breakfast (at around midnight your time) of vegetable rosti with mushroom and bean ragout. Be once more surprised by how tasty the meal is.
21. Watch Any Questions for Ben?, and decide to buy soundtrack on iTunes. The Aussie music might help with future homesickness.
22. Disembark at LAX with two hours to clear customs and find second plane that will take you to New York. Wait for over an hour in the line at Customs.
23. HAVE FINGERS NOT WORKY-WORKY.
24. Get taken to scary admissibility-check area behind ropes. Don’t cry. DON’T CRY.
25. Get taken to retest fingerprints.
26. FINGERS STILL NOT WORKY-WORKY THREE TIMES. These are my fingerprints. They really are. Have the men in the security area try to make you laugh because they can tell you might cry.
27. Get taken to another area to answer security questions.
28. Be given stamp of approval. Get personal escort all through LAX. Lovely man run run run jokes breathe feet hurt what time is it? stupid faint fingerprints run run run just in time on plane collapse shaky.
29. Eat third plane meal at what-time-is-it-o-clock, and mentally high-five Qantas for the veggie curry which is spicy, aromatic, and full of chickpeas.
30. Mentally retract high-five because the melon is soaked in devil fruit juice and therefore must be abandoned. Sleep from LA to New York.
31. Heart fluttering with joy, jump on shuttle to Grand Central Station, and then dance inwardly with pride because you’re able to walk directly to the hotel you’ve never been to before without getting lost.
32. Drop off bags in mini but new and clean room, which even has an ensuite (a rarity in New York, unless you’re the type who can also afford a private jet). Skip to nearest grocery store, then return to hotel for “dinner” of siggi’s Icelandic skyr and Ciao Bella pistachio gelato before falling asleep around midnight.
33. Wake up. NEW YORK HELLO YOU ARE JOY AND WONDERMENT.
Heel click,
Hannah
LOVE THIS! Welcome to the States! We can always use some sparkles and glitter a-la Hannah.
Aw, thank you Jess! Sparkles and glitter shall ye have! Or, at the least, I’ll try
Great inspired post Hannah … must be genetic. My fingers didn’t worky worky either but they didn’t take me away – that was in 2008 which was early in their fingerprinting policy. What is it about our fingers? Means, though, we can probably get up to all sorts of mischief. If the US didn’t have this policy we’d never know!
After spending fifteen minutes staring at my fingers, I concluded that my fingerprints must be ridiculously hard to read because the centre is almost smooth to the naked eye. This is your fault, I take it? Hmm. I guess that’s better than blaming it on all the piano and clarinet playing as a kid…
I think it is … when we went through in 2008, Dad was fine, but the nice official kept saying to me “press harder, press harder”. I kept saying “I am”. I was almost breaking my finger. I’m not sure what he got in the end but I felt that it wasn’t wonderful … I probably looked old and harmless though. As he was doing it he was joking about our Tim Tams which he guessed correctly was the food we were bringing in.
Hmm. Next time I’ll try pushing much harder then. Teehee, Tim Tams was my answer at the customs gate too!
Welcome to America!!!
You got hooked up with good airplane food- lucky duck! And I love your description of the Koko chocolate – scent = fear. LOL!
Thanks lady!
After the travesty that was eating Dagoba’s 100%, I’m quite terrified of any 100% dark chocolate that isn’t Pralus (mmmm, Pralus….)
I AM SO EXCITED
I love the look of your hotel room too – much nicer than the YMCA single room I stayed in back in 2008, which was equally small but far less clean and had no ensuite (but was cheap, and a single room, so I shouldn’t complain really).
Your plane flight also sounds much nicer than my long ones usually are (the worst was when I nearly fainted at the half way mark between Sydney and San Francisco…still don’t know why), but your fingerprint stress on arrival sounds horrible. America is not the place to have not worky worky fingers! I hope they behave from now on and your first few days in NYC make up for the arrival challenges!
My first hotel in New York was awful; it had orange and black striped walls, no window, the toilet was ages away down the hall, there was barely any room between the bed and the wall, and it wasn’t very clean. Ever since, I’ve stuck with either The Pod or the hostel I know and trust.
Oh gosh, [almost-]fainting on a plane wouldn’t be fun! Don’t do that again, okay?
Lovely post Hannah. Enjoy your jet lag….. I must say that I’m impressed with how edible the Qantas vegan meals look. I often get vegetarian meals on long haul flights, but they’ve not been that good. And how very brave of you to eat some more 100% chocolate. I tried that Dagoba one, and remain traumatised, and have put 100% in the never again bucket. I’m looking forward to your Gallivant posts, how long is this Gallivant anticipated to last?
I’ve told my friends and family to expect me back home anytime between four months and two years.
These were the best plane meals I’ve had, ever. Very impressed! I’m now experienced 50/50 with 100% chocolates: Lindt and Dagoba were wretched, Koko Black and Pralus were quite edible.
PS Your Pod room reminds me of tiny hotel rooms in Japan. I guess that’s big cities for you!
Except here, I can leave my shoes on if I want to!
Oh, and another PS, I think Qantas meals (as against their snacks) aren’t too bad considering. Neil Perry’s influence?
Perhaps! I was really very impressed.
Oh, man! This post fills me with great excitement! I can’t wait until it’s my turn to fly to America (assuming my application for a semester in Rutgers gets approved, that is). Where did/are you staying in NY?
And good food on a Qantas flight?!? THAT SH*T CRAY!
Also, did you have to sit through that lame and cheesy Olympic safety video?
If by “sit through”, you mean “already be dozing” or “fast-forward when it came before a movie”, then yes.
Squeeeee! Oh gosh, perhaps we’ll be able to meet up! How wonderful that you might be going on exchange! When will you find out/arrive? In New York, I either stay at Hostelling International New York, or one of The Pod hotels (I’m staying at their newest one now, which I got at a discount because they’re still doing some construction).
I’m looking to go in semester 2 next year so it’ll be a while yet (wait, will you still be up there?!). Will keep you posted
x
Definitely do! That is so exciting! And, in fact, is probably the only thing I’ve heard in 18 months that makes me actually consider returning to school…
Great post Hannah. Glad you made it safely. I love the descriptions.
yay yay yay!!! glad to hear you arrived safely!
Wheeeeeee! So so exciting. I love ordering the vegan meal on flights…. it ALWAYS comes out first, tee hee.
That’s totally one of the reasons why I almost always order a special request meal. I like feeling special.
Glad to hear you arrived safely! And I’m taking note for the future that vegan airline food is the way to go…
I must admit, I haven’t always had good vegan/vegetarian options on planes. But this time it worked!
NEW YORK! Awesomeness. I am glad too that the plane food actually looks pretty decent. And that you had chocolate to keep you in good company.
About half a kilo of chocolate, all up.
You really have spoiled us with such a glorious, long and detailed post so soon after arriving! I loved reading the details and seeing your photos.
3 plane trips – such a long journey!
Thank you Margaret! I had some performance anxiety, I must admit, about writing the first post. SO MUCH [self-imposed] PRESSURE.
Love this so much Hannah! I’m so glad you got there safely! I’m also way pumped for you and your adventures!! I’m so glad you will be updating us through your blog
Aw, thanks Gabby! I’m pretty pumped myself, I must admit.
LOL!! How hilarious your fingers didn’t worky worky
Love it! Hope you’ve over come the jet lag x
Hilarious… or quite scary and upsetting. But you know, stories are good.
Thank you! I’m not being too beaten up by jet lag, though do keep waking up for several hours in the night. Small price to pay!
Welcome to the greatest city on earth, Hannah
So sorry I wasn’t there longer for Blogher! Stupid exams.
Thank you, queen of the greatest city on earth! Stupid exams indeed, but that’s the price we have to pay for you also becoming the queen of all medical professions forever and ever amen. I have faith we’ll dance around this city with delight and exuberance one day! xo
Ah! Been thinking of your lots. Be out and having fun.xx
You, even. Clearly, I can’t even handle the excitement of Saturday night at home with Q.
I’m sure there’ll be many times when I long for the quiet joy of a Saturday night at home with a cuddlepet. Thank you Lexi xo
Epic start to what is destined to be a great adventure.
xoxoxoxo
I’m on the hunt for kale salad today. Thinking of you. xo
Hahaha, you had a good flight. And I love that the vegan meal is served first. Plus all this good man that helped you, hahaha. It’s sweet. Have lots of fun!
Thank you Marta! Chivalry ain’t dead
glorious funny happy post – yay for Hannah’s travel posts! I love your mini reviews – how you can fit so much in with so few words! I worried at your fingerprints but was amazed that anyone in customs might be nice in USA – I tried joking with them once and they did not have a sense of humour – maybe it was too close to 9/11
Thank you Johanna! I’ve been feeling self-imposed pressure about blogging during my travels, so I really appreciate your words
And ooops, yes, perhaps! I don’t think there was any joking at airports for quite some time after 9/11.
I didn’t know that fingerprints were a customs thing. Why do they need fingerprints? Isn’t your face nice and pretty enough? YES!
I loved the meals I had on Air France almost as much as I loved watching a man a few seats over consume like a dozen small bottles of something alcoholically toxic. Every time the stewardess passed by, he ordered another one. Boozer. But really, the food was delicious. Your meals look pretty good too.
How did those compression socks work out for you?
They’ve been doing the fingerprints thing for years, but I assume it’s only for we international folksies, so you probably haven’t had to go through THE ORDEAL. They do also take photos of faces, so that seems to be proof that my face isn’t pretty enough.
Even though I’ve been able to legally drink for seven years, I’ve never taken any of the free alcohol on planes. Knowing how much of a lightweight I am in normal air-pressure situations, I’m fairly certain drinking at high altitude would see me dancing in the aisles.
The shoes had “L” and “R” printed on them, so clearly they worked.
Yay! Hannah is at least on this side of the world yet still so far away sadface!
I cracked up at least 4 times reading this. I like your broom closet lodgings, and your gelato dinner.
If you jumped on a train right now you could be at my hotel in less that 16 hours! I know this to be true because I once caught an Amtrak from New York to Savannah and it took 16 hours! It was hellish but I made it!
Also, thank you. I had the fears when posting this, thinking that it might be booooooring.
OMG you’re so going to laugh but I wrote a really similar post to this! I want to send it to you so that you can have a chuckle over it but I know you’re going to be busy with New York! I mean it’s NEW YORK!!!
SPAY LADY MIND POWER!!! I’d love to read it! This week is probably my cruisiest week in terms of having time for the internet. I’m mostly on my own, you see, so am spending the days out and about before relaxing at the hotel at night. But even still, it’s a NEW YORK HOTEL!
I remember being shocked on my way to/from Europe at how delish the vegan airplane meals were!
YOU’RE HEEEERE!!!
AND WE’RE EVEN TEXTING EACH OTHER WHEEEEEEE!!!! xoxo
LOVE the secial meals
ANd Rowie’s cakes
Loved this post! So many great details already–the adventure has begun! And I love the hotel room, too: compact, but with everything you need–just like this post.
Have a blast! xo
Thank you Ricki! I’ve been feeling really nervous about blogging the adventure, actually. I’ve been taking it a bit easy these first few days, you see (jetlag and all), and am worrying about not being interesting. Thank you for the confidence boost
Oh, heel click! I can’t believe you’re there already. Wasn’t it just a few posts ago and you were in that 24/7 job??? You didn’t mention if there were tears at the airport. Perhaps there wasn’t time? I can never sleep before an early flight. Just so paranoid I’ll sleep through my alarm. I’ve heard that if you order different food (Kosher, Vegan, Nut-Free etc) you always get served first and you always get the better meal. I’ll remember that for my trip to NYC! Your room is tiny but you have an ensuite and you have it all to yourself. Enjoy your adventures. Very envious xx
I can’t believe I’m here already either! Funnily enough, it’s almost a month since I left my job now. Crazy! There weren’t many tears at the airport, but I think that’s because I used them all up the previous two nights
Special meals always get delivered first, but the downside is you don’t get to choose between two options – and sometimes they don’t give proper desserts to the special meals (banana?! who wants a banana for dessert?!) 
What a trip my friend, even though I’m still in Australia, welcome to the US
Seems like you went through a million flights but u guess that’s what they feel like
Already tried some gelato ay? I look SO forward to reading of your exploits and awesome times
Also don’t feel sorry for the youth of today, we didn’t like monte carlo either – lame!
Cheers
Choc Chip Uru
Three flights, so it was long but at least there’s a break to the monotony when you have to change!
But do you like Justin Bieber? Because that saddens my soul too.
Oh you! Glad you got there in the end. Despite the fingerprint-no-show-horrors, you do make it sound remarkably straightforward.
Also, glad to welcome another person into the International Sister-Brotherhood of Those Who Pack At The Last Minute For Significant Travels.
In all honesty, as long as my bags make it to the other side, I’m happy.
I honestly don’t understand how people can pack anything BUT last minute. They must be people with copious amounts of stuff and riches. If I packed days in advance, what would I wear/brush my teeth with/hide my face under?!
Great post! Travelling is stressful at times….but you made it!!! To New York!!!! It’s a fabulous city…have a great time!!!
Love it, Hannah! Have a fab time in NY
. Looking forward to hearing about your adventures… seems like it’s gotten off to a great start 
.
Oh I love you Angle Babe! You take good care of yourself and if you feel a lil homesick, there’s always Disney and UTUBE!!! And and and.. me! And trees? Were you drunk on the plane missy?
Smoochies!! Sadly I had to leave the external hard drive with all of your Disney movies on it at home
But I will youtube and think of you, Rake Sway TAKO MIND POWER! xoxo
P.S. I’ve never ever drunk alcohol on a plane. It would do. me. in.
OMG!~ I’m so happy for ya Sugar Twin – welcome to NYC – the city of dreams…..and cheesecake. Your journey officially begins. I still remember our discussions around our love for all things NYC/USA and it;s like all that talk manifested into your reality! Things happen for a reason.
Oh and all this plane food is makin me want to take a holiday
Aw, I love that you remember that, Sugar Twin!! In your honour, I have been eating full blocks of chocolate, though not quite cheesecake. Does kale juice count
I think you should come meet me here. Surely it’s time for another holiday for you? A BOOK TOUR holiday.
You made it!!! I swear even the journey to get there sounds like an adventure in itself. That room looks perfectly cosy to me. I take cleanliness over size any day. How are you still so energetic after all that. But then again, if I ever were to travel to NY, I think I’d be the same too ;p
At 30 hours of travel time, you better believe it’s an adventure!
And dear heavens yes, NYC > travel exhaustion every time. 
So happy you made it okay, even with the no worky worky fingers!
Glad to see you made it – with a good supply of chocolate along the way. Always important! What hotel are you at? The room is pint sized!!! lol
Unless you have squillions of dollars to spend, hotel rooms in NYC are always pint-sized! I’m so ecstatic I have my own bathroom this time though
SQEEEEEEEE!!!! (seriously, it’s Monday morning here, you’re not going to get any better than that out of me …
)
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I should know better than to read your posts while I eat lunch, they always make me want to eat chocolate! So glad you have arrived in New York and are having a good time already.
Love it!
Love you!
Long time since I’ve commented but still reading! LOVE that that choc is best before april 2012, no such thing as best before when it comes to choccie have a greta hol!
xxxx
Hi-hi! Lovely to hear from you! Oops, yep, I tried my darnedest to eat every chocolate before its “best before”, but there was too much chocolate and not enough days.
Oh awesome – I judge mightily on the quality of the airplane meal and these looked yum. So well done
Despite the jet lag, you are in NY baby! And love the chocolate sprinkled in between the travels. I don’t like scary airport men. NEW YORK!!!
As of tomorrow, actually, CHICAGO!!!
Such a great list!
I’m happy you had a good trip to NYC. Sorry if I missed it, but do you have some plans? Like, how long you’re going to stay and where, whether you’ll look for a job etc? Or will you just be floating around to where life carries you?
Bahaha! I love how your need to have plans for everything spills over into needing to know if I do!
I do have some plans, though in the US they’re mostly seeing-friends-and-floating plans. I’m not giving too many details of my movements in this public forum, but I have applied for a Canadian work visa in case I decide to have a go at living there. Is that okay, Mum? 
xo
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Wow I never remember to order vegan on flights! I am so old school! Glad yr trip went well and yr room looks sweet xxcat
Thank you my dear! I love ordering special requests; you always get served first
love this post. I was surprised with some of my plane meals too. Others were crappola though, let’s be honest. Oh & I watched Monte Carlo a few months ago….I felt like my brain needed a shower afterwards. love travel posts, they make me happy. Home for 1 week & already I’m ready to go again!
Heidi xo
Darling I adore you! Thank you for reading back through my posts and sharing our heart-same sentiments
Adventure time! Why aren’t my flights as entertaining?! Also the food does look surprisingly delish!
Awwww! Love this! I’ve been back in the States for two weeks, so I’m just catching up on your blog. The flight back and forth can be HARD, but I’m thrilled that you found ways to make it work. I always bring ALL my own food on a plane and never eat any of the airline stuff. I love this for two reasons. One- I get to pick lots of yummy things to eat on the flight and everyone with their mushy-pasta-and-chicken-of-dubious-origin is jealous of me. Two- I don’t have to sit there with my tray table down, feeling totally penned into my seat until the flight attendent comes to take away my dinner tray. I HATE how long they leave the trays out. Anyway… welcome to America! Have a joyous journey!
I always take snacks and fancy chocolate with me, for the first reason you describe – that feeling of superiority over your fellow passengers
You’re right about the tray table benefit too, though!