So, here’s the thing. I’m exhausted. But we’re all exhausted sometimes. So we keep going, because it’s the only option, and eventually breathing becomes easier again.
After the craziness of last week, I hoped this week would be calmer. Instead, there have been extensive meetings and a twelve hour workday that involved getting to work early, flying to Melbourne at midday, running a consultation until 8pm, then getting four hours sleep before flying back to Canberra the next morning and going straight to the office where the phone was already ringing for me the instant I stepped through the door.
That night, I went to gospel, and when I sang I felt like I was inside my voice but my voice was not connected to my body and I was spinning, floating. When I drove home, I kept getting distracted by the unicorns that were pulling my car-chariot down Northbourne Avenue. They had glittering tails, and they were real. I swear, for a few moments, they were there and they were real.
I take dessert seriously.
Also, I’d like to say that when a person has had four hours of sleep and everyone is saying that they saw the Transit of Venus and You Have To See The Transit Of Venus It’s Now Or Never You Won’t Be Here The Next Time Venus Transits You Have To See The Transit Of Venus, that person can’t be blamed for going outside and looking directly at the sun. I just wanted to see the Transit of Venus. I didn’t expect it to hurt so much.
When I think of everything that must be done in the next few weeks, my chest feels tight.
But even when I’m sitting in my car crying for absolutely no reason except that I can’t seem to stop, life is beautiful. Because Alinta crafted me a beautiful birthday card and Fiona sends me texts about sunshine and Lisa creates sparkles in my soul with her emails and, in Melbourne, my brother came to visit me in my swanky hotel room and we lay on the floor side-by-side talkingtalkingtalking and these were the highlights of my week.
Another highlight was the video about the baby pig and the oatmeal, because it’s too much. It’s too much. I can’t even cope right now. It’s too much.
I think I need to go watch the baby pig video again, and then curl up in bed to read.
After feeding my unicorns, of course. They eat only Sturt’s Desert Roses picked under the light of a new moon whilst Simon and Garfunkel’s The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin’ Groovy) plays from an old-school boombox.