This post arises from the fact that I am both similar to and very different from a koala.
What koalas and I have in common is that we both spend a large portion of our waking hours eating (or thinking about eating), but we diverge in the sense that koalas eat only eucalyptus leaves forever and ever, whereas I crave novelty on my plate.
Luckily, I have friends (human friends, even) who support me in my quest for delicious, new, and often From-The-Overseas treats. For example…
In the package of goodies that Heidi put together for me whilst gallivanting around America, I found a vegan fruit and nut bar that appealed to my raw vegan dessert tendencies. Pure Bar’s Wild Blueberry Bar is made of dates, blueberries, walnuts, cashews, rice protein, agave, lemon and a few other little bits and bobs.
The taste is fruity with a subtle nuttiness, but more than anything this bar reminds me of my mum’s apple and boysenberry crumble, perhaps because her (gluten-free and vegan, no less) recipe has walnuts in the crumble. Heidi, thank you!
Can I tell you a secret? I actually bought this Cocopure Coconut Chocolate Chilli Goji Butter to take to Melbourne as a gift, but I accidentally left it at home. So when I returned to Canberra, I ate it. Can I tell you another secret? I think my subconscious made me forget to pack the jar on purpose. This was wonderfully rich with a fruity edge and the odd chilli kick. I finished off the jar with naught but a spoon direct to my mouth.
Tangent: if you’re a Whitey-McWhitester Paleface von Alabaster and you go out for breakfast at 9:30am and spend an hour and a half in the not-even-that-bright-sun, you will turn into a Whitey-McWhitester Burntface von Alalobster. If you then spend the next two days walking around for hours in the sun without applying sunscreen, you will find that two weeks later your shoulders are still faintly pink.
That has nothing to do with food or koalas, of course. Just a reminder to Slip Slop Slap.
I deeply, deeply, deeply love enormous bowls of raw vegetables. This one is topped with sun-dried tomato pesto. Also, do you like the green vase, cinnamon sticks, and 6-piece coaster set version of The Lady Of Shallot by John William Waterhouse in the background? My subconscious left them there on purpose for you.
Sometimes, if you go to a café and request Tabasco sauce, you will receive not Tabasco sauce but three little pots of tomato sauce, barbecue sauce, and sweet chili sauce.
The waiter was clearly flirting with me. I mean, three different sauces? That’s practically a marriage proposal. I bet he didn’t even spit in any of them.
This was the Thai Iced Tea that I-Hua’s Boy ordered at iSpicy. I think it will shock most of you to hear that this was too sweet for me. In fact, my tastebuds actually tried to hide upon encountering this drink.
At Komeyui, we received an amuse bouche (or the Japanese equivalent) of sweetened black beans. These were also too sweet for me. I powered on and ate them regardless, though, because, well, free.
This last is a lavender macaron from Farmer’s Daughter, which was not only pretty but helped make work taste more like an potpourri-scented underwear drawer. Who wouldn’t want that?
I think I might go make a cup of tea and keep reading my book now.
Question Time: What flavours would you like to see in a fancypants coconut butter? If it’s doable (that is, if you don’t say something like “hibiscus flowers picked at 2am on the night of the solstice whilst wearing a petticoat made of stardust), I might try to make it for you. By which I mean I’ll make it for me, but in honour of you.
I would sell my soul for Coconut Chocolate Chilli Goji Butter. Seriously. Chocolate + heat = heaven.
I made a spiced almond butter that rocked. Maybe I need to revisit that with some chocolate added in… let’s face it, everything is better with chocolate. (Even oranges, though I know you disagree.
)
You don’t need to sell your soul, Laura, Probably just a kidney; that should be enough to get you a flight to Australia.
Spiced ‘most anything is awesome. Spiced oranges, maybe. BUT NOT SPICED ORANGE CHOCOLATE.
That coconut chocolate butter sounds special. I made peanut and toasted coconut butter, that was pretty good. I think I will add raisins next time
Even though I’m normally anti-raisin, I have enjoyed PB&Co’s Cinnamon Raisin Peanut Butter before, so I support your decision
I must highly recommend including macadamia nuts and white chocolate (or cacao butter) in your next batch of coconut butter
I should’ve guessed you’d say that
I needsta find me some cocoa butter! Or stock up on that vegan white chocolate that I originally bought for you and then ate. Also, I need to repurchase, well, EVERYTHING that I originally got for you. Expiry dates, anyone? I fail at life.
Same here
My problem is getting my ass to the post office and sending it all…::sigh:: ‘twould be so much simpler if you’d just send YOURSELF here…
Bahaha! That’s exactly my problem. What’s made me feel better all this time is knowing you’re just like me
I keep staring at the coconut chocolate chili goji butter. That has my name written aaaaaall over it. I don’t think I could top that flavor but I’ll try: vanilla coconut lavendar sounds like the dainty sister to the evil yet decadent spicy chocolate one you tried, challenge on!
Oh my heavens oh my heavens of my heavens. Casey, that’s a brilliant idea! I just need to track down some food-grade lavender
My first thought was, “Oh! Do a coconut and rose butter!” But then I wondered if maybe that might taste a bit too much like the tiny dust-covered hand soaps in my grandmother’s bathroom THAT YOU MUST NEVER EVER USE. And so instead, I leave the flavor choice in your more capable hands.
*giggles* Oh Alayna, I like you more with every passing comment! Neither of my grandmothers had luxury forbidden soaps at their place… but I can’t help thinking this might have been because my brother and I would have sneaked off with them if there had been.
Coconut and rose is *brilliant*. I’m definitely keeping that as a possibility; might throw in some cashews or something too though.
Some flirt, he didn’t even give you the sauce you asked for! How does one make coconut butter? Does it involve coconut oil, or some other magical trickery? I feel like I’ve missed an important post, probably while I was in Cairns working my face off this week. I’m off to catch up.
Yes, there was that slight issue, but perhaps he was just asserting who was going to wear the pants in our future relationship? “You’ll eat the sauces I say you can eat, woman! Now go get me a beer.” (Clearly, he didn’t know I have secret sociologist training.)
Coconut butter is the easiest thing in the world; you just whizz desiccated/shredded coconut in the food processor/Vita-Mix and it turns into butter. I’m yet to make straight coconut butter or do a proper tutorial, but I’ve blogged a bit about chocolate coconut butter twice here
I still love that chilli coconut butter
Or at least, I think I still love it because I haven’t justified a repeat purchase since my last Fremantle trip, and I haven’t re-created it at home since my first attempt. You’ve reminded me to fix that!
Also, that raw blueberry bar looks divine. Divine!
Have you tried any of their other flavours? To be honest, I didn’t find it truly chocolate-y enough for me, and if I’d truly been purchasing for myself, I would have got the coconut cashew vanilla (I think?) one. But gosh, so smooth and unctuous!
Teehee, that blueberry bar’s given you an idea, hasn’t it?
I haven’t tried any of the others…I think it’s the chilli kick rather than the chocolate that I like most
And yes, the smoothness! But darker chocolate / extra cocoa would improve their version I think.
So many ideas floating around in my head and such low likelihood that they translate into anything of any use!!
Darling, I’m certain that any ideas floating in your head and destined for magnificence.
Petticoat made of stardust!
Oh.
Please make one for me? I know you can, I *know* you can!
xo
I could drink thai iced tea by the bucketful, love love love it.
Teehee, I would honestly love to see you try! Everyone at the table said it was far sweeter than they normally are
OMG, I’ve been meaning to tell you that I found a store in the city that stocked Cocopure coconut butter! Mind you, they only had one flavour (vanilla) but I was so happy that I didn’t care. The health stores I visited in Queensland last week had more of a variety but for some reason, charged a lot more for them. Weird.
Oh, what flavour? A salted caramel one would be just divine!
Did you get the vanilla one, did you did you?? That’s the one I’ve wanted to try for so long, but can never justify buying it for myself [on purpose
] And yes, health stores do tend to be rather… unique in their pricing. But ah well, at least they haven’t all be put out of business by Woolies and Coles!
Salted caramel… ooh yes.
ohhh I loove pure bars!!! especially the cherry and blueberry
ohhh I know!! add dulce de leche to the coconut choco butter. Or, some kind of orangey flavor? I think dark chocolate+orange together are DE-VINE.
ps: I hope your hip feels better Hannah! All I know is that lots of icing with a towel might help ya.
Are you trying to hurt me, Ellie?! Orange and chocolate, the combination that makes me nauseous even from the aroma? *curls into a ball and cries*
However, the dulce de leche idea is *brilliant*. I forgive you for the orange thing, because of that.
And thank you! I’d never thought of icing. Unfortunately, I’m guessing you’d need ice?
oooo I’ve tried the Cocopure vanilla and the cashew cacao – both very good delivered by spoon to waiting mouth. Not sure if I like the whole chilli-chocolate flavour combo
I made a walnut/carob/coconut butter = yum!
Ummmm, how about cherry, chocolate coconut butter? I thought you didn’t like coconut though?
Oh oh! The cashew and the vanilla are the ones I’ve been wanting to try for months and months! I chose this one because it was meant for someone else
Ooh, you’ve reminded me of the walnut, coconut, and cinnamon butter I once made! I’d love to play around with carob in future.
I’m coming around to coconut. I like it when other flavours are involved, though, to tone down the coconuttiness
Coconut and.. I can’t think… Carob? Not impossible.
But what could I possibly send you from Italy!!!!
Carob and coconut would be wonderful. I fell in love with carob via raw desserts, so I can definitely see it working!
All I need from you in Italy is your wonderful comments and blog
Ouch, burnies!!!! So happy you had the bar and it reminded you of more deliciousness
I love the idea of a vanilla coconut butter mmmmmm vanilla beans. But sorry, the vanilla pods must be opened at 2:05am. Deal breaker.
Heidi xo
I’ll set my alarm and get right on that coconut butter for you! Oh, who are we kidding. I’ll still be awake at that point
I love blogger package love! (Yes, I just used love twice in the same sentence.) That looks like some great loot!
And congragulations on your marriage proposal! I’m sorry it didn’t work out, but at least you had a big bowl of veggies to make up for it.
Teehee, who’s to say it didn’t work out? I could be eating satay sauce and hollandaise sauce on my honeymoon right now!
OMG Stardust petticoat. Would wear. Okay, so tears of a narwhal are out. I haven’t looked at anyone else’s comments so not sure if this has come up already, but perhaps pineapple lime? Or coffee bean?
I feel your pain so literally on the sunburn front.
I like your saucy waiter story, perhaps you should continue requesting things to see what happens…
Coffee will definitely need to be done soon, though perhaps with decaf instant powder so that I don’t have to forego my midnight nut-butter-with-a-spoon-standing-at-the-fridge habit. Pineapple lime? Oowah! Will need to track down some good quality dried pineapple for that one
I’m sunburnt again today! After only 40 minutes walking around the lake at 10am. Mostly IN THE SHADE. Gah.
Yes, I think I need to head back to that cafe pronto.
What else do koalas and heel-clickers have in common? They sleep a lot during the day and are good to cuddle.
Sleep a lot during the day? Dear heavens, I wish. If only I slept a lot at any time of my life, ever!
Yeh. I was kidding about the first common trait.
I love coconut butter!! Actually coconut anything most days these days – weird huh since I never really liked Bounty’s….hmmmm….
I’m quite jealous that you had a marriage proposal just after three sauces!! It took, 6 years, a lifetime promise of chocolate and a big fat Indian wedding for it to happen to me!!
Also – how bout a pina colada type of coconut butter?? Would that wokr? Or would you just end up getting drunk on the fumes??
Bounty Bars always made my throat feel like burning. So sweeeeet!
I’d like to reply wittily to your tongue-in-cheek comment, but I’d probably start crying instead.
Pina colada. That makes me think coconut, dried pineapple… vanilla? Mint? What else is in that? I’m so not a cocktail drinker…
Dear Hannah,
Heidi always tweets delicious and healthy looking lunch boxes and that bowl of raw veges with sun-dried tomato pesto reminds me of a lunch she would like too. And I know about those shockingly sweet iced teas because there are Malaysian versions of them too – absolutely undrinkable for me!
What an honour! Heidi’s my homegirl, so it delights me that you’ve connected us via that veggie bowl
Isn’t Heidi lovely! And ouchies, you poor thing spay lady! Do you have some aloe vera to help with your sunburn? And are you and the waiter dating now?
I-Hua actually did have some aloe moisturiser, which helped! She’s not here with it right now, though, which is unfortunate as I’m a lobster again after a mere 40minutes at 10am, walking mostly IN THE SHADE. Gah!
Oh yes, he and I are booking our honeymoon cruise as I write this.
What a fun bunch of nibbles. I’d like to try that coconut butter, not sure if I’d like it though. Sunburn no fun of course. What book has been keeping you occupied of late?
Reading/interchanging three very light and fun reads at the moment: Marieke Hardy’s You’ll Be Sorry When I’m Dead, [rereading] The Stone Key (what must fantasy books always hit the 1000-page mark?!) because my uncle gave me the next in the series for Christmas, and one of the Sookie Stackhouse books. Yes, I’m sure my mother is ashamed of me.
I’m glad that you clarified the differences between koalas and your good self, because I didn’t want to read, “Oh and I smell like urine and eucalpytus too.”
LOVE the lavender macaron, but am currently contenting myself with four squares of Cadbury Caramello, lovingly brought over to Love Chunks from an Aussie friend. I could live without it when in Oz, but it’s strange what you miss when you don’t have access it to.
Coconut butter dream mix? Vanilla and cranberry?
No, no, I hope not to smell like urine for a good many years yet.
You’ve now made me think of Cadbury Caramello Koalas, which I used to pounce on in those fundraising boxes that kids carried around in high school…
Love that idea! Might play with dried cherries instead of cranberries, though. Like the former’s tartness more
I don’t know if I can suggest anything that tops chocolate chili goji butter! Perhaps Chai spices and dark chocolate coconut butter would make an interesting mix?
I’m really confused as to why lavender macarons are so good, because lavender totally reminds me of potpourri in an underwear drawer. Hm!
Chai spices definitely tops chilli goji in my mind! I’m still a bit skeptical of people trying to sneak fruit into my chocolate
Funnily enough, I’ve always *hated* lavender as an aroma, but love it as a dessert/chocolate ingredient!
Looks yum! Good to see a nice boutiquey looking chocolate cafe open up in my hood xoxo
ouch – that sunburn looks painful – and I bet it doesn’t go brown like my sister does when she burns – but on the other hand I hope your hands don’t burn like E’s did when he first arrived in Australia – I am in the middle – I burn but not to much – yet I always find a place where the suncream doesn’t go and the sun does!
and I think I would love to snack on the bowl of veg – they look very good because the air con here isn’t working well and I think I just need a cooling snack
Nope, I just go pink and then super-white again! As I’m doing right now, after forty minutes of walking in mostly shade at 10am yesterday. Ridiculous! I’m envious of people who don’t turn red as soon as they step outside
Cooling snack? I wish I could recommend the raspberry whip (it’s perfect for summer), but you and your egg whites
This was another post that my pirated internet decided to only half load. And then yesterday decided to not load. I can’t picture what plain coconut butter tastes like so I can’t even begin to dream about what to put in it. Sadly I still have bacon on my mind. Hmm. Nope, I’ve got nothing.
I love that sunburn. Did I ever mention the sunburn that stayed on my back for over a year? How does that even work?!??!
Plain coconut butter just tastes like coconut. AMAZING! At least, my homeamde kind tastes like desiccated/shredded coconut, because that’s all it is. And then whatever else we choose to throw in!
Teehee, I definitely thought about bacon coconut butter when I thought of you and this question! I reckon it could be done… but I probably won’t do it
Year-long sunburn works because you and I are magical.
Haha this is great! I can relate to the koala thing. I would actually like to see a lavender vanilla flavor. Yum
That’s two votes for lavender vanilla! Three, if you count me. If only that stupid Essential Ingredient shop with its edible lavender didn’t close before I finish work every day…
Hahaha, Hannah you just made my day with this post! Your writing style is so funny, I was having a good chuckle at my desk and even while typing this I am still smiling. My highlight was the going from “Whitey-McWhitester Paleface von Alabaster” to “Whitey-McWhitester Burntface von Alalobster”, as well as the “potpourri-scented underwear drawer”
April, thank you from the trees to the stars for this comment! I’m smiling all over the place myself, thanks to you
It’s all I could hope for.
AND in this post…
Oh, there’s no photos for me to interpret in this post. Oh I know – that first photo looks like a koala. *beams*
I’m so proud of you right now I could burst!