Or I was going to keep telling you about Melbourne.
Or I was going to describe to you the rather tasty dessert I made, several weeks ago now, for a dinner party with friends.
But then I came across these lines in the book I’m currently reading:
The moon will not be patrolled and she shines free and fearless and there is no sin in anything that shines that fucking much.
- A Love Letter From A Stray Moon, p.70
I didn’t realise at first, but my left hand was curled so tightly in on itself that my fingernails dug into my palm.
Later, I ate an embarrassingly large amount of the slice I ostensibly cooked for tomorrow’s party, all because parts of it were a little burnt and for some reason I thought that the way to fix the mistake was to eat the evidence.
And then on the next page of the book, I found this:
It’s a display, that’s all. The reality is that I hold my own hand, I cry, I drink, I sleep.
- A Love Letter From A Stray Moon, p.71
I closed my eyes. I wrapped myself in memories that feel like a warm blanket of feathers at the same time as they feel like knives in my throat, and I let myself sink.
Then I looked at this photo of my dog, which my friend Jess took on her phone after my birthday dinner. As ever, this photo of my Demon Dog made me laughlaughlaugh, and so I let myself push off hard from the ocean floor beneath me in search of air.
I was going to write about a really fantastic chocolate today.
But instead, I wrote this.
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I wants to hug Jedda!!!!!!!!!!!!
No way; you’d eat all her food!
Aww look at that little demon, with the flouncy feet and ears.
And stay off that ocean bottom:) There’s nothing down there but those funny angler fish that try to lure you in with their oh-so-seductive dangly things – don’t be fooled!
*sings* Someone’s been watching Finding Neeeeemo!
In all seriousness, thank you so much my friend
I think you’re absolutely right about the evil seductive creature that lurk down in the depths!
xoxo
“there is no sin in anything that shines that fucking much”
How amazing is that line?!
You have no idea how happy you made me in writing this comment. I’m so glad I’m not the only one for whom that line sings!
Not only does it sing, but I believe it sings soprano. Thanks Hannah. You have no idea how much this touched me.
*hugs* I think I might – it really seared through and helped me; I can only hope it did as much for you
You made that dessert!? It looks amazing. I always start out with an idea of what I’m going to write about in my head and then the post takes on a life of it’s own! Haha.
Aw, thanks Cait! I did in fact make it, and I’ll tell you about it soon so you can too
It’s really quite easy! And yes, posts do tend to go where *they* want to, don’t they?
Yay sounds good! I can’t wait to hear about it. And absolutely, posts definitely do
awww i hope you are doing okay…~~
Thank you – feeling better now
Obviously, you are the hero of this tale – saving the innocent party-goers from the horrors of burnt edges! There is no sin in anything that tastes that fucking good.
I. Just. Love. This. Comment.
Thank you, so much
xo
More poetry, please! I like these kind of posts. Do them more often, and appease the tasteless masses with gratuitous shots of flourless chocolate cake, if necessary.
If things were different, and I was currently writing this from your guest bedroom, I would right now be dropping everything to run upstairs and give you such a big squeeze-y hug that we’d both be breathless.
Thank you, my darling friend. I felt quite vulnerable putting this post up, and fearful of silence in the comments. Thank you.
The sin line is just beyond epic. Your doggy is super cuteeee!
I’m so glad you agree! And I, in turn, agree with you – my dog is super cute
Sometimes, meaning just strikes us with a vengeance.
And sometimes, it’s just plain wonderful when it does
(And it also reminds me why I need to read more fiction!)
Moons shine and that’s cool n stuff, but you are my sunshine, and you absolutely GLOWWWWWWWWWWWWW.
I glow because I reflect the light from you, my shining star
Thank you for being.
“The moon will not be patrolled and she shines free and fearless and there is no sin in anything that shines that fucking much.” Love this line!
Me too, so much. I’m so glad you do too
Ha! “eat the evidence” – love the way you think My friends still bag me about the time I made a cake but decided to eat half. I seriously couldn’t stop myself so I ended up coming over to their house with a half cake. So bad.
And this, Adrian, is why our friendship was written in the stars
You totally could have gotten away with saying your adorable puppy ate it, though!
Oh, this is touching and warm and heartbreaking. Sending you hugs, Hannah bug! Beautiful quotes.
Heidi xo
Heidi, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Hugs gratefully received – can’t wait for real ones in future
xo
I would eat burnt bits to clean up a slice. I would laugh at the dancing demon dog. I just wish I also had the energy to read such lovely books!
I’ve decided that making the time to escape in a book is going to be one of my commitments to taking care of myself
I hope I stick to my guns about it!! So tempting to just read blogs all night instead…. And I’m glad to hear you’re a fellow burnt-bits crusader 
But it’s Friday! You can write about anything because of course the next day is the weekend and we love weekends
We do love weekends, particularly when they involve 60th wedding anniversary celebrations with one’s beloved family… or is that just me?
You know what? I’m kind of glad you did
But I hope you’re ok – beautiful quotes and beautiful writing, but I fingernails in palms make me worry! xx
Thank you, Kari. It is truly such a relief to hear you say that
I’m nervous, posting things like this sometimes! I’m doing okay, and palms have recovered. Looking forward to seeing lots of my extended family tomorrow 
I LOVE that quote! Now I’m going to have to download the book.
It’s a fascinating and beautiful read
Thanks for popping by! 
Eating the evidence is ALWAYS the best way to fix [food] mistakes.
And, I like those quotes as well, especially the first – is that a book, or an essay, or what?
If only we could eat all our mistakes, food-related or not. I definitely wish I could digest some of the stupid things I’ve done in the past!
It’s a book, a novel, a kind-of stream-of-consciousness, poetry-like fictional memoir of Frida Kahlo – this is the Penguin Books link, and this is my mum’s review of it
Cute dog
And that sounds like a really interesting read!
It’s fascinating and beautiful – and quite short! You should add it to your pile of to-reads
Your puppy looks very pleased. I call dogs of all ages puppies because puppy is a much nicer word than dog, and also dogs remain child-like and adorable their entire life, so surely puppy is a much more appropriate name!
My mum looked after my puppy while I was in Melbourne and she just confessed she was feeding him smoked salmon and cream cheese sandwiches??!!
I, too, usually call all dogs “puppy”, but decided to go with the accurate term for the sake of alliteration
My puppy definitely still acts like a puppy despite being (I think) 12 years old… except, of course, in the mornings when she hobbles out of bed into the cold!
Wow, lucky puppy of yours! Just as long as she left off the raw onion
I LOVE that first quote, and not just because it has an f-bomb in it. We should all be the moon– though if we’re gonna get technical, it is a holey rock with no shine to it….
Nah-uh, Sophia! Technically, the moon is made of green cheese!
<3 That is all, my friend.
And that’s all I need. Thank you
Don’t go sinking too far into memories. Make new ones. We can only go forward. xx
HEART. (Water! Earth! Fire!)
I shall, I will, I am [trying]
Thank you, BFF.
Oh Hannah, I’m glad you like that book but do get the fingernails out of your palm …! Be gentle with yourself.
I’m trying, I am
You get a skewed view sometimes, I know, but palms are more often than not unblemished. I would have called you, today, to tell you about the meet-up, but if I’d called you would’ve thought it was a prank caller just breathing down the phone! 
Bestie Darlin! I sure am hoping you’ve jumped out of the funk you were in on Friday and are now feeling better. Sending you hugs, stay warm my dearest. And, take a day to get better you hear. Love Love. Xxx
Seeing you yesterday did bucketloads to dispel any lingering funk. Particularly when we shared our stories of falling-down humiliations
Wish I could’ve taken the day off, but my voice betrayed me by coming back enough this morning that I couldn’t justify it! :S
Sometimes I enjoy a good wallow, myself.
But aside from being a little depressing, how’s that book?
It’s fascinating, very much a stream-of-consciousness style of poetic writing. Do you know much about Frida Kahlo? I didn’t (which I’m ashamed to admit), so it was a great way to learn a bit more about her
Not a whole lot until I saw the movie. But even now all I can remember is her horrible accident and !Unibrow!
I’m not sure I’m a big fan of stream-of-consciousness writing. At any rate, I don’t think they have that book in the states anyway, so I guess I’ll never know.
Ah well, plenty of other good book-fish in the sea
I’ve probably spent the better part of my morning reading your blog and it’s made my day just that little better…I mean you food, humour, fantastic writing and CHOCOLATE. I am rather ashamed to call myself a chocolate lover now.
*Bows down to the Queen*
But then you go ahead and bring this post with that line and I think I am in love.
I’m sitting in a far away country, away from my beloved Melbourne, my loves and wanting to simultaneously bury myself in the covers of my bed or run or…something. Loved it. Hope you’re feeling better now as well
Sig, I really can’t express how utterly and completely your comment was like a burst of smile-creating sunshine on this cold, drab day in Canberra! I’m so honoured and ecstatic that you’ve been reading along here, and am thrilledthrilledthrilled that this post, this quote, these thoughts, spoke to you as they spoke to you and subsequently led you to speak to me. (That wasn’t a convoluted sentence at all…
)
Oh, how I know the feelings of simultaneously wanting to hide and run, all the while dreaming of a life in a place you long to be back in/venture to! So happy my little blog gave you a bit of space to breath, and look forward to chatting more with you in future
xo
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