Let’s jump right into this, okay? The sooner we start, the sooner it’s over…
Cadbury Dairy Milk with Roasted Cashews
Once upon a time, there was another Cadbury block of chocolate.
The Dairy Milk chocolate employed in this block had a cocoa content of 26%, for which I believe the technical term is “laughable”.
That said, the chunks of roasted cashews in this bar comprised 22% of its weight, which meant that almost a quarter of the chocolate block wasn’t, in fact, Cadbury chocolate.
It came as no surprise that this chocolate aroma was extremely sugar-based, with sweetness and caramel overpowering any hints of nuttiness.
(can a nose cry?)
The Dairy Milk chocolate had some hints of caramel, and perhaps even a tinge of dulce de leche (if we want to sound like yuppies*). The dairy notes were thin and fleeting, like skim milk, rather than rich, like cream, and I’ll be buggered if there was much “chocolatiness” to this chocolate.
(please let’s have no buggering today)
After the utter lameness (I wish lameity were a word) of the nuts in the Cadbury Bar of Plenty Roast Hazelnut and Honey Roast Cashews, I was prepared to be tremendously underwhelmed by the cashews in this bar. But you know what? The cashews were this chocolate’s only saving grace.
(aaaaaaah-maaaaaazing grace, how sweeeeeeeet the soooooouuund)
So let’s talk about that. The cashews in this Cadbury bar had a strong, freshly-roasted, almost-savoury nutty strength to them, and even managed to cut through the one-dimensional sweetness of the Dairy Milk chocolate a little bit.
(heart-healthy [nut] fats at war with the saturated kind… oh, my confused arteries)
Ultimately, this chocolate wasn’t as bad as the Bar of Plenty Cadbury chocolate, but it still inspired naught but apathy in this chocolate-lovin’ girl’s heart.
But you know what doesn’t inspire apathy? Having booked a flight to Melbourne for next month, so that I can spend time with my brother E.Teacherlord, my BFF, and my Spy-Man. I honest to goodness can’t wait. Does anyone have Melbourne recommendations for me? ‘Cause I need to think about it now to get myself out of this week’s gloom-boom-doom. Yay Melbourne!
* I totally love dulce de leche more than “caramel”. It’s a food snob thing.