Once upon a time, there lived a PhD Princess by the name of Wayfaring Chocolate. She lived high up in a tower (the third-and-uppermost floor of a unit complex) beset on all sides by ogres (Mr.StinkyNeverWashes), trolls (the person who left the mean note on my car windscreen and made me, which is to say the Princess, cry), and witches (the person/s who make the stairwell smell like a certain illegal substance that rhymes with “dot”).
Although the Princess is currently bereft of seven small men to cook and clean for (she ain’t no Octomum), and is yet to be awoken from sleep by a kiss from a handsome prince, she does have something in the way of a Fairy Godmother.
Except this figure is more of a Chocolate Godmother than a Fairy Godmother (and is also more Actual Mother than Godmother).
This is what the Fairy [God]Mother brought back for the Princess from a recent work trip.
Ten Degrees Chocolate Dark Chocolate Chilli
Back when the Princess was just a tween, a chilli chocolate truffle from Hobart became the first step on her magical journey into the far-away land known as Chocolate-Is-For-Life-Not-Just-For-Christmas.
It’s only fitting, then, that the Fairy [God]Mother knew that a gorgeous slab of dark chocolate laced with chilli flakes would strike joy into the heart of her daughter. Add in the home-made look of the broken-off slab and the intoxicating sweet aroma that burst forth as soon as the package was opened, and you’ve got yourself one happy-to-be-momentarily-forgetting-the-perils-of-her-surroundings Princess.
This Princess was amazed by the overwhelming scent of coconut rough and toffee that swirled around this chocolate bar. How could it smell like a coconut rough? There was no coconut to be seen, neither in the bar itself nor the ingredients list.
Perhaps her thoughts were being muddled by the “dot” outside? No, that wasn’t it.
Her interest suitably piqued, the Princess took one of the shards of chocolate and placed it in her mouth, half-fearing that this South Australian company’s chocolate would have the same non-taste as the Carmel Valley Western Australian chocolate did a few weeks back.
The Princess closed her eyes briefly in pleasure, for this chocolate offered up a definite and delicious chocolatey flavour. It was a very sweet chocolate, reminding the Princess of her schoolyard days spent eating butterscotch and honeycomb whilst her evil stepsisters got stung by bumblebees.
Then her eyes fluttered open, because this chocolate was not at all shy in its chilli kick. And by chilli kick, the Princess means a chilli roundhouse-smack-to-the-solar-plexus heaty-heat-heat-heat. The chilli flakes contributed no fruity flavour but rather a burning, spicy heat, which built up from a slight tingle on the tongue to a roar at the back of the throat.
Don’t get the Princess wrong: she loves chilli. She loved the roundhouse-kick. But she would recommend to all her singing forest friends that they ought to be ready for heat if they try this bar. The combination of burning spiciness and vanilla-and-honeycomb-esque sweet dark chocolate was utterly pleasurable and, as aresult, the Princess has something to say to her Fairy [God]Mother:
Thanks Mum. I might even save you a nibble.